Divorce is one of the most difficult and stressful life events to go through. Where many uncomfortable emotions surface and Can leave you drained, overwhelmed and anxious. The good news you don’t need to go through it alone. Whether your contemplating divorce or planning for a divorce support is available.
First you need to ensure Separation and Divorce is right for you. It is not a decision to be taken lightly, but living in a state of in-decision and limbo can be emotionally and physically draining, as well as damaging to your marriage. If you are undecided I can guide you through some questions to give you greater clarity on whether to stay or leave.
If you decide to stay in the marriage I can help you take the right actions to rebulid connection, love, trust and happiness. Or if divorce is what you decide then you’ll need to prepare carefully and ensure you both protect and take care of yourself. See tab Divorce preparation and support.
Are you wondering whether to stay or leave your marriage?
If yes, you may feel emotionally, mentally and physically drained from all the over-thinking. The process is made far worse if you have no one to confide in and work through your options.
Do any of the below hold true for you?
“I sometimes think my marriage is over but other times I have hope.”
“I love my husband/wife but we no longer make each other happy.”
“I want to divorce but I feel I cannot because of others reactions”
“I feel trapped and unhappy but I have no way out and want someone I trust to talk to.”
“The relationship has ended but culture, society and family make it impossible for me to leave.”
“I want to save the marriage, but I don’t think we can?”
“I want out but don’t know if I will ever have the courage”
Deciding to divorce is a major life changing event and it is critical to think it through carefully. Marital problems, pain and frustration in your relationship does not always mean divorce. It is important to have a safe sounding board to talk these issues through. I run the below program with great success to help husbands or wives gain clairty on how to move forward.
Deciding if the marriage is over
If you are stuck in limbo not knowing whether your marriage is truly over and divorce is right – you are not alone. This is the most popular program I run. Many people find it mentally and physically exhausting, being trapped in this painful state of not knowing whether to stay or leave. This is not good for you, your health or your relationship. Typically people that book this have been burying their true feelings for months or even years. There is no easy way to make such an important decision, but there is a process that can give you more insight and clarity into what you would need to change and approach with your spouse, to make it work if you stay.
In the first session we explore what has led up to the booking of the session, you will be able to in total confidence share what has really been playing on your mind. Then we will go through your most important emotional needs in a relationship, these are what you need to fall and stay “in love” with someone.
This will give you a clear picture of what your spouse would need to do in order for you to be happy and fulfilled in your relationship. Essentially what will help you fall back and stay “in love” with them.
This is powerful because once you have clarity on this, it is up to you to assess and ask for their willingness to make these changes. We will also discuss how you can approach any sensitive issues with them in a non-confrontational way. At the end of the session I will give you a small assignment to complete before the second session.
In the second session we review the relationship in its entirety. We will chart the high and low points of the relationship. Examine any issues that you still are emotional about and perhaps cannot move on from. This review helps you to gain perspective on the whole relationship, rather be focused purely on past events. You will see clearly all actions that need to happen for the marriage to be the way you want it to.
Lastly and very importantly we will focus on your values and plans for the future. I will help you uncover your inner core values, so you can assess with your partner if your future is aligned.
Please note with this program:
Some leave the session with a clear indication of whether the marriage is over or not. For others they have clarity on what they need to address in their marriage for it work and for them to be happy. By completing the emotional needs assessment, relationship review and values you will have greater awareness on what is most important to you in a partner and relationship, which can be enlightening.
If you are unsure about sharing your thoughts and asking your spouse directly about their needs, values and future plans, don’t worry I will prepare you as much as I can. For those who still don’t feel comfortable talking issues through many book their partner the same VIP assessment day with me. After your partner has had their session we sit down all together share your discoveries, desires and agreed a way forward.
Working with me
My name is Nicola Beer and I support my clients in Dubai or further afield via Skype to explore their options before making any snap decisions. For example we can look at resolving the marriage, preparing you emotionally, logistically and strategically for divorce. It is crucial to consider all your options and plan for your future. Having seen first hand the damaging impact divorce can have, it is my mission to support you to reach your own decision on divorce and if you do decide on divorce, to help you manage it with minimal pain to you, your spouse and your children.
I do this by helping my clients to see if the relationship is really over or whether we can resolve the issues. Whatever you decide we create a strategy for moving forward, minimizing stress and heartache. I support both individuals and families through this difficult time by providing compassionate and non-judgmental support. The divorce counselling programs I offer are strictly confidential. Whether you are living in Dubai or futher afield you can book a free online 30 minute Divorce support consultation with me below